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Limited edition Martyn TurnerMAGPIE: A BURGLAR who broke into a funeral parlour in Spain tried to fool police by playing dead. But he was caught out when police spotted his scruffy clothes - and then noticed that he was breathing.
Police and the Crespo Funeral Home said they had no idea what the man (23) was trying to steal.
Neighbours of the business, in Burjassot, near Valencia, alerted police when they heard the door being forced in the middle of the night. Police officers arrived with the owner and eventually found the suspect lying on a table in a chamber used for viewing dead people during wakes.
"The custom here is for dead people to be dressed in suits, in nice clothes that look presentable. This guy was in everyday clothes that were wrinkled and dirty," said a police spokeswoman.
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In Britain, a crematorium has come up with a novel solution for mourners unable to attend a loved one's funeral.
Southampton Crematorium has started a pay-per-view scheme which allows mourners to watch the funeral online.
For a one-off fee of £75 (€96), friends and family are able to view the funeral service live on their computer screen via a video camera placed discreetly in the chapel. The company behind the scheme, Wesley Music, is also offering DVDs of funerals for £50 or audio recordings for £25.
"The service is designed very much with the distant relative or ill friend in mind," said manager Trevor Mathieson. "Families are getting older and more dispersed and it is not always easy to get to a funeral these days."
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A leading UK building firm has banned its bricklayers from wolf-whistling at women.
The firm, George Wimpey, says that the "outdated" tradition is a distraction for househunters.
The Bristol-based company outlawed the custom of builders showing their appreciation of women walking below the scaffolding for fear of putting off "savvy and sophisticated" buyers visiting sites.
Sales and marketing director Richard Goad said: "In the 21st century the wolf whistle is out of place . . . The builders I've spoken to on all of the sites are happy enough with the ban. As far as they are concerned, if it encourages more women to visit our developments, then they think it can only be a good thing."
© 2008 The Irish Times
This article appears in the print edition of the Irish Times


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